presents...

Parakeet Training Record

Train your parakeet the scientific way!

In the 60's, science had an answer for everything, and vinyl did much more than just supply you with the latest pop tunes. For a mere 98 cents, this 45rpm disc from Hartz Mountain claimed to be able to teach your parakeet to talk using a "scientific new method". The idea, it would seem, was to place your bird near the record player while a "carefully trained voice" recited over and over again a series of banal phrases. "Hello, baby", says the voice. "Hello, baby".

Whether this worked or not is anyone's guess (put me down for No), but judging from the wear on this particular disc, it would appear that somebody gave it a shot. It's actually hard to imagine how much easier using this record might have been compared to the "old fashioned" method it replaced. Considering that each side of the thing is only about 3 minutes long, a dedicated parakeet owner would have had to do an awful lot of record-flipping to generate any appreciable amount of listening time. Weigh that against the disadvantage to having your parakeet learn only those phrases carefully selected by the Hartz Mountain engineers, and -- wait, I keep forgetting. This was the 60's, and these are consumers we're talking about.

It's too bad that the parakeet training concept seems to have been a passing phenomenon. With today's multi-gigabyte MP3 players able to hold hours of sound, it might actually have a chance. Hello, baaaaaby...

Parakeet Training Record
(click picture to magnify)
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Songs:

Introduction/Hello, Baby! (Real Audio) Teaching your parakeet to talk is fun! But the old method took too much time!
Good Morning (Real Audio) Good morning. Wanna eat? Good morning. Wanna eat!
Real Parakeet (Real Audio) If you ask me, the "real parakeet" sounds suspiciously like the announcer holding a handkerchief over his mouth.



Your Comments:

Joon-Buhm says:
What would you think is the fastest way to hand train a bird? (10-13-2004)

Lenny says:
Just curious....what should I serve with a blue parakeet? White or red wine?

I'm a little ignorant culturally, so any advise from the group would be great. I can't afford a turkey for Thanksgiving this year. (10-08-2004)

Peanut head says:
I am sorry everyone. I am going throw my hormones. You see I am really a man/women. That means I am half man and half women. I was really a man, but I then found out that I was a gaywod. I would for anything to lick a man's armpitts hair. I also want lick there sweat. So I got a serjury to be an man/woman. Now I have a boyfriend and I still love all of you (exscepially the hot men). I am the dummy. bye. (10-06-2004)

elbarto (elbarto@yahoo.com) says:
all my bird do is lift is his smelly wings and show is arm pits ,wingpits, and fluff and preen and dum stuff like that (10-05-2004)

elizabeth (Lizzie_girl_77@hotmail.com) says:
hey.. i just got a parakeet and its so beautiful well i found it in my yard the other day yeah we went to the pet store and yeah i love it.. (09-26-2004)

BenT says:
Alex, I suggest the next time you come, you don't do it near the bird. The bird obviously isn't into that weird stuff. (09-23-2004)

Tiger Woods says:
Hi, My name is Tiger Woods,I am a professional golfer and winner of 8 majors including 3 Masters, 2 U.S Opens, 1 British Open and 2 P.G.A Championships. I have a lot of birds, I have 70 to be exact. I have them all crammed in a tiny little cage. And a lot of them have died, it makes me sad. One time i threw my parrot on the frier and he burnt up real badly.I thought he died so naturally I buried him. A few months later when I was going to bury these 7 dead parakeets I found in my cage, I stumbled across the grave where I buried the parrot. And to my surprise he was still alive! Oh the joy i felt! Yay! Yay! Yay! So I stuck him back in the tiny cage I have which by then had 80 birds crammed inside. But then he died a day later. I like to wrap up cockatiels with duct tape and jam their heads in the ground and blast away with them with my brand new Nike ignite driver!! (09-22-2004)

egmin (ghgh) says:
hi when i bring my bird not he wants to gat back
please HELP ME. (09-22-2004)

Alex (Alexfeindt619@aol.com) says:
Every time i come near my bird he fluffs up and when i stick my hand in the cage he gets so scared HELP! (09-18-2004)

yosdani (www.yosdanifl@terra.com) says:
can you show me how to training a parakeets because I have 5 parakeets and I whant to training them to sing (09-15-2004)

Spazzmatazz (Spazzmatazz@hotmail.com) says:
"i definetly don't wanna argue like some low life from the 1950's or something."
Well I guess that leaves ME out.... (09-14-2004)

kkirra (jamhedan@yahoo) says:
hi again i just need alittle help what should i do (08-30-2004)

kkirra (jamhedan@yahoo) says:
hi i love my bird but it is so scared of my hand she goes crazy when i feed her she flys all over the cage and chirps i just want to hold her.HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!************************ (08-30-2004)

Frank LaRosa (frank@franklarosa.com) says:
Website administator is Peanut Head/ Richard Cranium. They have the same IP address. (08-12-2004)

Website Administrator says:
We are currently monitoring the activities of one "frank(FrAnK123@aol.com).

It has been determined that he is in violation of section 4, sub-section 2 of the Internet Accordance Policy.

His IP address has been logged by our organization and further violations of this Policy will be dealt with accordingly. (08-12-2004)

frank (FrAnK123@aol.com) says:
watch out!! theres this guy called peanut head whos really dum and likes causing trouble.if he annoys u just tell him to get a life.and i also have a bad feeling that richard cranium is peanut head because they both have snotty accents. (08-12-2004)

emily (kittens@internetexplorer.com) says:
i love my bird sky but ive had him a month and he still wont come to me when i say come!! what should i do (08-08-2004)

Paisner & Co says:
Paisner & Co (08-08-2004)

Richard Cranium says:
Hamizah, perhaps there is SOMETHING ELSE that is scaring your bird.

Know what I mean?

eh, probably not.

Rich (08-08-2004)

Hamizah (hamizah1696@hotmail.com) says:
i have had my bird, Lucky for a long time and i can't train her. She's so scared of my hand. (08-08-2004)






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