presents...

Beats!!!!

The Merseyside Sound! New From Britain!!

We laughed when we heard the Ruttles and Spinal Tap singing fake Beatle songs, but this is for real. Beatlemania was so big back in the 60's that it spun off dozens of cheap imitations like this one. With an album jacket screaming "Beats!!! The Merseyside Sound! The New Beat from Britain!" and four guys trying to look like the Beatles, the only thing this album is missing is actual Beatle music.

Were Beatle fans so stupid that they didn't realize they were being taken? Or were records like this aimed at their parents, who weren't paying enough attention to know the difference? I don't know, but one thing is for sure: the music on "Beats!!!" is just plain awful. Pick up a copy at a thrift store or eBay auction near you and listen for yourself. You'll be thankful that Lennon and McCartney had some actual talent to back up the phenomenon they started.

Beats!!!!
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Songs:

Tell Me I'm The One (Real Audio) Recycled beatlemania at its finest.
Your Kind of Love (Real Audio) A twisted beatle-esque song about monogomy, I think.

See Also: Beatle Barkers

Your Comments:

Ball Vision says:
And they ain't eyeballs neither! (04-29-2004)

Ball Vision says:
I have balls in my eye sockets!!!!!!! (04-29-2004)

Stinky Mcfingers says:
Suck them long. Suck them hard. (04-29-2004)

Doctor Distorto (9888@bellsouth.net) says:
Actually I think this Fabs rip-off is lots better
than most..anyone ever sit through a Buggs or
Beattles lp? The Beats do the definitive
"Joshua fit de Battle of Jericho" for this listeners money. (04-28-2004)

Johngeorge McStarkey says:
Actually, it is a little known fact that the Beatles copped their act from us, the Beats. (02-23-2004)

Dirk Mc Quickly (punk@floyd.com) says:
Nasty, I am still not talking to you! You didn't even invite me to the Rutles reunion album! These guys had more talent in their left nut than we did.
Now Piss Off!
Dirk (02-10-2004)

Nasty (nasty@rutlecorp.com) says:
Hey, The Rutles were the ORIGINAL pre-fab four. These guys ripped us off also. Please write your congressman. Or the queen. (01-24-2004)

Tol Puddle Martyrs (tolpuddlemartyrs@hotmail.com) says:
actually, our music SUCKS!!! (01-19-2004)

Greg (Gregvw@aol.com) says:
Actually, they had three different album covers for this same record: one with five (5); one with two (2)' & one with one (1) picture, all picture from the five picture album. Now, THAT'S Creative packaging. The Beat, alias the Mercy Beats, alias the Mersey Beats of Liverpool, alias the Liverpool Beats produced at least three different albums, that had different songs. The two others are "A Hard Day's Night - The Merseybeats of Liverpool" (almost sounds like a Beatle album title!) and "The Mersey Hits -The Mersey Beats of Liverpool." It looks like the records were produced in Canada under the Arc International Record Co. label and one cut "I'll Keep You Satisified" was charted for eight weeks or more by leading Canadian radio stations including Toronto's CKEY. Any mor info out there??? (11-05-2003)

stevie wonder says:
this is crap (10-18-2003)

Greg (Gregvw@aol.com) says:
I, from Wilmette, Illinois (a suburb of Chicago)had this album when it first came out at the begining of the BEATLE'S tidal wave. Unfortunately, I tossed it after a bit, after finding out it WASN'T the Beatles! I had been looking for a copy of ever since then, and randomly found one online from a record store's list. This album was issued with two different covers:One as the BEATS!!! w/five action shots and one as THE MERCY BEATS! w/two of the above photos blown up. I wonder if the Beatles ever sued them for exploitation? However, I am happy to play it and remember those good old days of THE BRITISH INVASION! (10-17-2003)

Hans Kesteloo (h.kesteloo@chello.nl) says:
Hans Kesteloo from "Beyond The Beat Generation"
http://www.beyondthebeatgeneration.com
Awesome 60's punk/freakbeat/garage/psych Radio-24 hours a day.
"There were so many great artists in the mid-sixties, the Tol-Puddle Martyrs belong to my highlights: Australian best !
Hans. (07-18-2003)

Jesus McCarthy says:
Ooh, the Tol Puddle Martyrs...NO ONE GIVES A ROOTING SHIT! So shut your head-hole. (07-14-2003)

dawn english (dawnenglish@hotmail.com) says:
I would like to know how much this beats album is worth. and some information behind this group.
Information is hard to get on this group. (06-16-2003)

Beverly Paterson. (BPater1032@aol.com) says:
Tol Puddle Martyrs/Misty Lane Records/Beverly Paterson Music Columnist.
PO Box 6474, San Mateo, California 94403


Thanks to reissues and a forever growing interest in sixties music (particularly that of the regional variety), this mighty fine Australian band is probably more famous today than they were when they were active. Rave reviews have introduced Tol-Puddle Martyrs to a whole new generation of folks and even celebrities like Bobby Vee, Davy Jones and Peter Noone sing their praises. Released on vinyl, "Time Will Come" is a four track EP featuring each side of two singles Tol-Puddle Martyrs recorded that stormed the local airwaves. The title cut of the disc initially appeared on the decks in 1967 and is allied with the type of toxic stuff outfits such as The Rolling Stones and The Chocolate Watchband were responsible for coughing up. Steered by stinging fuzz guitar licks, clinging rhythms that sweep and soar and doom and gloom oriented lyrics, "Time Will Come" is a hot-blooded rocker, while the same can pretty much be said of "Social Cell," which is embedded with one heck of a stabbing hook. By the time Tol-Puddle Martyrs unveiled their next single the following year, they changed their footing and adopted a pure pop approach that borrowed moves left and right from mid-period Kinks. Charmingly quaint, "Love Your Life" and "Nellie Bligh" are as melodic as can be and burst at the buttons with bright and sunny textures. Every song on "Time Will Come" ripples to a poetic quality and the sound is positively piercing. No wonder Tol-Puddle Martyrs are enjoying a second round of recognition!

http://crea.html.it/sito/NOWSOUND/1.htm (06-02-2003)

Johnnie (torresongs@yahoo.com) says:
This album might night have been so bad if they had made an effort to find singers that actually sounded like Lennon and McCartney. These guys are so off-key! The musicians weren't all that bad. They had the right idea of how to imitate the Merseysound. They just sounded a little lethargic. Someone needed to light a fire under their chairs! (05-29-2003)

Mad as Hell (shitler@hotmail.com) says:
What the fuck is up with this dumb fuck who keeps spamming his stupid fucking tol puddle bullshit? (05-21-2003)

Tol Puddle Martyrs (http://hometown.aol.com/bpater1032/myhomepage/profile.html) says:
If you luv 60's Garage/Psych, you just might be interested in reading the latest review from America of The Tol Puddle Martyrs/Misty Lane release:

Tol Puddle Martyrs/Misty Lane Records/Beverly Paterson Music Columnist Lance Monthly:
http://hometown.aol.com/bpater1032/myhomepage/profile.html (04-06-2003)

Tol Puddle Martyrs (tolpuddlemartyrs@hotmail.com) says:
If you luv 60's Garage/Psych, you just might be interested in reading the latest review from America of The Tol Puddle Martyrs/Misty Lane release:

Tol Puddle Martyrs/Misty Lane Records/Beverly Paterson Music Columnist Lance Monthly:
http://hometown.aol.com/bpater1032/myhomepage/profile.html (04-06-2003)

Steven says:
I have a similar Beatles exploitation album on Diplomat Records. It's called "The New Sound From England BEATLERAMA With The Manchesters". Songs include "I Want To Hold Your Hand", "She Loves You", "My Bonnie Lies Over The Ocean", "The Beatles Move", "Shortening Bread", etc. There was a whole slew of these budget label, faux-Beatles albums in the early 60's: "The Beetle Beat"/The Buggs, "The Bearcuts Swing in Beatlemania", Beat-A-Mania!", "Do The Beetle"... (03-18-2003)





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