presents...

Mrs. Miller's Greatest Hits

Oh, the humanity!

I've spent a lot of time contemplating the mystery of Mrs. Elva Miller from Claremont, California. I have to conclude that her recording career is one of the cruelest practical jokes ever devised by the record industry.

For the most part, the flubs on Frank's Vinyl Museum are the result of serious artists and serious record producers badly missing the mark. Mrs. Miller's album is definitely over the top, but I get the very sinister feeling from the liner notes that while Miller herself may have been completely serious about what she was doing, whoever coaxed her to make this album was laughing on the inside, and probably egging her on to be even more extreme. The sarcasm is very subtle, just enough to give the wink to record collectors like us while keeping poor Mrs. Miller in the dark. References to her "impeccible diction" and "scintillating delivery" abound, as well as the accolade "one of the most interesting voices extant... one that brings to mind the tonal qualities of a Florence Foster Jenkins or a Mrs. B. J. Fangman". Jane Morgan's Fresh Flavor LP, featured elsewhere on this site, contains similar sentiments, but at least she can lay claim to some prior recording history.

I almost feel bad for exploiting Mrs. Miller this way, but once you listen to her songs, you'll know why her fans can't resist her. Enjoy!

Mrs. Miller's Greatest Hits
(click picture to magnify)
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Songs:

Downtown (MP3) Brace yourself for the best rendition of 'Downtown' ever!
A Hard Day's Night (MP3) Beatle butchering at its very best.

See Also: Fresh Flavor

Your Comments:

Robin (ramnicki@yahoo.com) says:
Just listened to Hard Day's Night.
She ALMOST makes Yoko sound good!#%$@ (12-08-2002)

Deana (deana@csd.uwm.edu) says:
Hey Mom!

Mrs. Miller has changed my life - I cannot get enough of her; my mother, Sue Hovind, introduced me to her just yesterday. I find her music so soothing, and I love to have her on while I'm baking a pie.

(11-29-2002)

Sue Hovind (hovind@earthlink.net) says:
My God, I can't believe what I hear! She is a hoot. I just can't get enough of "Downtown" The whistling is over the top! Where can I get a cd? I can't wait until the next family gathering, when everyone has had some to drink, and then.........Mrs. Miller! she's a babe. (11-26-2002)

belly laugh says:
I haven't laughed this hard since my first viewing of Peter Sellers in The Pink Panther. Have plenty of tissue handy. I can only imagine that the producer/engineer knew that every take was destined to be a gem. The more off-key and out of rhythm, the better. (11-22-2002)

Cupid Stunt says:
Please send help - my spinal cord has just dissolved from this noise. I am a blubbering mass of skin and muscle, twitching on the floor.

Please - no more! (11-21-2002)

mtchdtn says:
This has all the hallmarks of several other comedy albums released by Capitol Records featuring fractured music. Big Band singer Jo Stafford and her husband, arranger and band leader Paul Weston, were both under contract to Capitol and released several comedy music albums under the names of Jonathan and Darlene Edwards. The liner notes read the same way - veiled references to purity of tone, etc. This seems to be more of the same... in fact, I suspect Jo Stafford may be the vocalist here. The picture? Character actress, of course. For subtler, and funnier, tunes like this, check out Jonathan and Darlene Edwards! (11-19-2002)

Patrick (patrick_pritchard@yahoo.com) says:
Florence Foster Jenkins with a beat. This is the stuff on which Hyascinth Bucket (Keeping up Appearances) is nobly founded. Excruciating and hilarious. Why we have no male exemplars of such awful vocalizing is curious. I swear if I ever had to listen to this live I would go beserk and break things. A taste on disc when you are in the mood to assault your ears with the unimaginable and laugh till you double up - but live, never, I couldn't bear it. (11-18-2002)

nick smoove says:
Florence Foster Jenkins was another "horrible voice" artist. I have a pic of one of her records on my website in the Golden Throats section:

http://www.io.com/~dork/records/sleeve.html (11-16-2002)

Frank (bmgbmgbmg@bmg.com) says:
I'm leaving my wife & kids to search for Mrs. Miller. I know she will love me as much as I love her. I want her to sing me to sleep every night. Is she still alive? (11-11-2002)

June Carrington / London UK says:
what a voice. when I first heard her I thought of me god who is this woman and what is she doing in a recording studio with great musicians. I always put her cd on after my guests are drunk. Finally, I made my husband listen to her, he is hard of hearing and for the first time in his life he was pleased to be deaf! (11-09-2002)

Neil H (shesmy@bitch.to) says:
I love her so much !
I dream about her ! (11-05-2002)

Candi-Oh says:
That was truly amazing! The shock kept rolling over me in waves, every bar continually more shocking than the last.

so, what Was Mrs Miller's claim to fame? why doesn't she have a first name? Was she an especially influential catholic school nun who showed up in some Music Exec's life at a particularly sinful time? was this some sort of payoff? (11-04-2002)

Gary "Luv U Mrs Miller" Mitch (Mrs_Miller@Shes_My_Bitch!!!) says:
A true siren ....Police, Firebrigade, or ambulance!!! (11-04-2002)

Gary Mitchel says:
Mrs Miller - Shes My Bitch!!!!

Leave her alone, she is trulu unique to me!! (11-04-2002)

simone (simone_rachel@ourbrisband.com) says:
you suck and you are a bitch and i hope you die and one day i will kill you so watch out and fuck your boyfriend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (10-30-2002)

Gary Mitchel says:
Mrs Miller - Shes my Bitch!!! (10-30-2002)

Buck Satan says:
And Mrs.Miller too.

No...actually she rocks. (10-18-2002)

Buck Satan says:
Telly can eat my shit. (10-18-2002)

dr doctor says:
Hmm, strangely fascinating, kinda like a loud fart in an empty auditorium. I've listened to the damn thing about six times now! (10-12-2002)

Gannymede says:
My god! A sonic assault on sanity!! Who/what is this creature? That's the first time I've seen my annoying little brother silent in his 9 years, I don't know if he thought I'd lost it for playing it or if he was just cowering in confused awe! And what's more amazing, grampa says the radio played her back in the 60's! Is that what started the viet nam war? (10-12-2002)






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