presents...

Mrs. Miller's Greatest Hits

Oh, the humanity!

I've spent a lot of time contemplating the mystery of Mrs. Elva Miller from Claremont, California. I have to conclude that her recording career is one of the cruelest practical jokes ever devised by the record industry.

For the most part, the flubs on Frank's Vinyl Museum are the result of serious artists and serious record producers badly missing the mark. Mrs. Miller's album is definitely over the top, but I get the very sinister feeling from the liner notes that while Miller herself may have been completely serious about what she was doing, whoever coaxed her to make this album was laughing on the inside, and probably egging her on to be even more extreme. The sarcasm is very subtle, just enough to give the wink to record collectors like us while keeping poor Mrs. Miller in the dark. References to her "impeccible diction" and "scintillating delivery" abound, as well as the accolade "one of the most interesting voices extant... one that brings to mind the tonal qualities of a Florence Foster Jenkins or a Mrs. B. J. Fangman". Jane Morgan's Fresh Flavor LP, featured elsewhere on this site, contains similar sentiments, but at least she can lay claim to some prior recording history.

I almost feel bad for exploiting Mrs. Miller this way, but once you listen to her songs, you'll know why her fans can't resist her. Enjoy!

Mrs. Miller's Greatest Hits
(click picture to magnify)
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Songs:

Downtown (MP3) Brace yourself for the best rendition of 'Downtown' ever!
A Hard Day's Night (MP3) Beatle butchering at its very best.

See Also: Fresh Flavor

Your Comments:

Vynyl Junkie (SASdj@yahoo.com) says:
Oops! A co-worker of mine was intrigued by the fact that I still have a turntable, so he & his 8-year-old son stopped by so his son could hear what a record sounds like. I guess I didn't consider that the LP was eclipsed by the CD long before the kid was even born, but was glad to demonstrate. Unfortunately, I selected Mrs. Miller's Greatest Hits (always fun to observe the reaction) which I'm sure left a rather sour impression on the young boy's mind of what the vinyl LP is all about. Because of my mistake, he will forever associate our beloved vinyl with incredibly poor performance. Sorry, LP lovers - I'll NEVER do that again! Maybe I'll burn him a cd copy of "Disco Polka"... (01-27-2005)

No Name (No Address Neither) says:
Hey, Lady! Careful where you stick that thing! (01-21-2005)

Raymond says:
A Hard Day's Night est une des plus mauvaise reprise des beatles que j'ai entendu de ma vie avec celle de Help par Mme. St-Onge. Mais que voulez-vous, il en faut de toute les sortes pour faire un monde! (01-03-2005)

Kenneth Bestwell says:
I love her version of Groovy Kind of Love!
Even better than the Rascals'one.
No doubt Phil Collins one is of poor quality.
Long live Mrs. Miller! (12-04-2004)

Mrs Miller Fan (mrsmillerfan@downtown.com) says:
Absolutely amazing! I can honestly say it's like nothing else I've ever heard... (11-22-2004)

vinyl jerk says:
I believe I have heard about this record through the record collectors grapevine. According to other vinyl collectors she was actually the mother of some suit at Capitol, who pushed this project through as a gift to his mom. (11-16-2004)

Mad Dr. Matt (Magob@aol.com) says:
What's with you and April Witchell? One of you guys is cutting in on the other's action! She has this same site - minus the dicussion board - darn! She also has a radio show on KABC in LA with about 50 million listeners. Maybe it hasn't been syndicated out there in BUSH country! You folks don't seem to be getting much in the way of information out there in Ohio.

Let's see...

Iraq? Anyone? Anyone? Okay - you in the back. Nope. Nice try though.

How about huge deficit spending? Anyone? Anyone? Didn't think so.

Unemployment? Hello?

Okay - how about gay marriage? Ah-ha! NOW I have your attention... (11-11-2004)

kunta (mugu@com) says:
guy man keeeeeeeeeeeeeep offfffffffffffff (11-08-2004)

kunta (mugu@com) says:
guy man keeeeeeeeeeeeeep offfffffffffffff (11-08-2004)

Arbol01 (arbol01@gmx.de) says:
Ich kann nicht mehr. Mir bleibt vor Lachen fast die Luft weg. So eine abgefahrene Version wie dieses "Downtown" habe ich noch nie gehört. Immerhin erinnert mich die Stimme an eine große deutsche Schauspielerin "Brigitte Mira". (11-02-2004)

ROFL!!!!!!!!!!! says:
I got all of her songs on LimeWire...

I am stuffing some stockings this Christmas!

I plan to tell my kids it was their gramma who made the CD years ago! (10-30-2004)

KERRY & EDWARDS IN '04! says:
VOTE KERRY/EDWARDS! (10-27-2004)

Joe Faherty (joefaherty@yahoo.com) says:
She is F%$&ING amazing. Her vocal stylings bring joy to my heart and make me long for the good ole days of music. She will be missed.

R.I.P
Elva (10-05-2004)

Ted says:
Today, October 5, is Mrs. Miller's birthday (according to imdb of all places) (10-05-2004)

Stacy (stacy@hotmail.com) says:
Oh cum on down town Mrs. Miller. I love her!! (10-04-2004)

Ken Stoeffler (twelvetone12@yahoo.com) says:
Where can I get a copy? I love the whistling at the end of "Doentown". You know, Mrs. Miller is the original DIY punk. (09-19-2004)

Cha Cha (Sululala@upper.com) says:
She sings as though she has studied voice with my ass cheeks! She is so great! I love her face and breasts (09-18-2004)

theo (theo@oelewapper.com) says:
somebody got a lover's concerto for me as mp3?
Thanxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx (09-16-2004)

Scaryduck (scaryduck@fastmail.fm) says:
She sounds like she's driving a tractor across a ploughed field with weights tied to her breasts. I ask you - WHERE WAS SHE ON AMERICAN IDOL? (09-14-2004)

Spazzmatazz (Spazzmatazz@forpresident.com) says:
Mrs. Miller makes me cry. (09-14-2004)






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